So i tried to call M as i'd been stewing about it all day and was getting myself in a state. His sim card that he had to buy on holiday wouldn't accept my call so i just had to sit and wait. I was conscious H was around so couldn't really talk to him so when he called i answered it and hung up knowing he'd then call back and went upstairs so i could say something. All i said was why did you log in to AM on Saturday. He said he had gone on so he could delete his profile. So why was it there this afternoon? Anyway i just said i couldn't chat and if he wanted to leave me a VM to explain he could do. he called maybe a dozen times after that and got upset, eventually going over to the internet cafe so we could chat online.

When he got to the internet cafe he must have logged on to AM cause his profile is now gone. Although i've been ok with him i still don't believe he went on on Saturday to delete his profile. He knows about the internet, he's an IT kinda bloke and knows his way around AM, christ he's been a member for long enough! So if he deleted it on Saturday it would be deleted, just like it was deleted the minute he went on it last night.

I'm disappointed. I feel like i've been betrayed. The thought of him even exchanging emails with another woman fills me with dread.

Am I being irrational?? Maybe. But it's only because i love him so much.

This morning i feel ok but it is on my mind and i do still feel a bit bitter. I don't think he's telling me the whole truth if i'm honest and knowing i don't trust him 100% scares me.